Prompt: What does a good mentor "do"?
The simple answer - a good mentor teaches.
The not so simple answer examines the multi-faceted world of an educator. Just as teachers try to learn and teach to the children they have in their classroom, so does a good mentor inspire and help address all the areas of those they are helping. Now, there are all sorts of mentors, and people who think of themselves as mentors; but to really boil down the leading characteristics that merge to form a "good mentor," you look back at all the people who have influenced you along your path to get you where you are at this moment as well as to where you see yourself in the future.
To continue with this post, I must say that the focus of my characteristics of a good mentor will mostly be drawn from two of my greatest mentors - my parents. Like I've mentioned in early postings, both of my parents are dedicated educators. My dad has been a teacher longer than I've been alive, and my mom is right up there with him. They've served as some of my earliest mentors during my educational career, and now that I'm a fellow teacher, they continually offer me their wisdom. So, it only makes sense to write about what good mentors "do" by actually writing about what I've had the privilege of experiencing so close to home (pun intended). So here it goes...
For me, these are the top actions of a good mentor:
They inspire you.
Each individual can pinpoint the exact moment when something made sense because another person put into words all the ideas that were muddled in their own brain. For many, it's probably a grade school teacher or a parent. These individuals served as some of our earliest mentors. You push yourself to be better because they have shown you that the sky is the limit. They don't tell you your dream is too big, or that you will never accomplish that goal. They are your cheerleader because they know that all it takes is a single moment of inspiration to set in motion some of the grandest plans.
The passion the greatest teachers offer their students can make all the difference. The amount of passion that a mentor can pass along to other individuals can change the world. When you see how driven and passionate someone is about their life's work, you can only hope to be half of what they are. When I look at the amount of knowledge and skill that my parents have, I'm in complete awe. Ever since I was little, I remembered people coming up to my parents and saying hi to their former teacher. Several times, they tell me I'm lucky to have them as parents (trust me - I know!). To have your former students come up to you 20-25 years after you taught them and tell you that you were one of their favorite teachers, geesh, that's amazing. I freak out if my former students even remember my name, and here my parents are getting bear hugs and praises (and sometimes, even discounts on dinner - ha!).
They listen to you, and then offer advice.
Most good mentors understand the value of failure and hard work. They themselves may have stumbled, and for teachers, the longer you are in the profession, the more things you see and experience. I don't know how many times I went to both my parents with my issues of classroom management, or grading, or dealing with reluctant students. Every single time, they've sat there and heard everything that I had to say and then offered their advice, if they felt it was warranted.
In my first year teaching, I hit a point where I thought that I was a massive failure. For some reason, my students were really not into the whole "studying at home" idea, and I was beginning to feel the pressure of the looming state assessment. I got home from tutoring, went straight to my bedroom (yes, I still lived with parents ... thanks, student debt!), and broke down in tears. It was my dad who gave me about five minutes to let it all out before he came in and asked me if I wanted to talk. And, it all came out ... the frustration, the uncertainty, the fear, everything. He just sat there and listened - he didn't interrupt, he just sat there and listened. When I finished speaking, he looked at me and said, "You are an amazing teacher, and these kids are lucky to be in your class. You will always give more than 100% because that's who you are; don't give up on them, and don't give up on yourself." We talked for a couple more minutes, and I realized that being a teacher was more than tests and grades; and, more so, that while I may want to help every single student that walks through my door, each student may not learn what I want them to learn. Now, my dad probably doesn't remember this particular event, but it will forever my etched in my mind.
They don't let you settle for mediocre.
Like I've said earlier in this post, mentors are cheerleaders. They will always root for you, but unlike cheerleaders who can't really critique the team they are cheering for, mentors will tell you exactly like they see it. When you start to pull away from giving your best, they will be the first to tell you to reevaluate you current decision-making process because it's probably a little out of whack. They know your potential, and they want you to reach it, or more importantly, surpass all expectations. It seems like they know you better than you do sometimes because they will randomly drop little hints that you should push forward. Perseverance is the language of the mentor.
They want you to be the best you can be, even it means that you may become better than them.
If you were to look at many of the schools in my school district you would notice that the number of young teachers is slowly creeping up on the number of veteran teachers. The slow shift in the demographics of teachers in the district changes each year. These new teachers bring with them new skills and talents of a world that many veteran teachers were not as easily influenced by. The internet, social media, and technology are at the forefront of the education sphere, and my friends, many college graduates are fluent in the language of the 21st century. Many mentors would realize that the best thing for the students is the opportunity to learn in a format most conducive with growth of their skill set. So, while many individuals may shun the shift in education, many mentors realize that these skill sets brought by younger generations could positively shift the dynamics of education, so they are willing to learn new practices, or allow their successors to fully develop their own skill set.
Now, my parents will tell you that technology is not their forte. My mom has even decided that cell phones are just not her thing. If either of them have questions about the school's gradebook or lesson planner, they call me to help figure out what happened in the program. When I talked to them about setting up a Twitter and Instagram page for my classes, they looked at me as if I was speaking a foreign language and no context clues was going to help them figure it out. But, they have never discouraged me or said that I'm wasting my time. Instead, my dad has asked me to help him set up his own Twitter for PD, and my mom asked me to help her set up her iPad.
Just the other day, I was showing my mom a new on-line learning platform that now allows my students to actively hold discussions, and she looked at me and said, "I wish I had something like this when I was in high school." She didn't tell me that I was wasting time showing her something that she will never use with her second-graders. She's also mentioned several times that she loves listening to me talk about my classroom, and constantly asks me how the "Twitter thing" is going. Actually, she proofread one of my blog posts because, even to this day, my mom is the BEST proofreader I know. So while technology may be my thing, and I may better utilize it in my classroom, my parents (aka mentors) have never said anything to discourage the use of it.
So mentors serve the important role of providing the necessary traits of a master teacher. For us educators, having someone to turn to for guidance is of the utmost importance. A mentor keeps you sane, passionate, and always reaching for the stars. The funny thing is that we are constantly trying to do this for our students ... every single one!
-A
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