Ch-ch-ch-changes

Prompt:  How have you changed as an educator since you first started?

Considering the fact that I've only started my fourth year teaching, this question shouldn't be too difficult to answer.  However, since I've only completed three years of teaching, there is not much information to base my answer on.  Unlike those teachers that have been teaching for a considerable amount of time, there's not a significant set of examples to use in describing the changes that I've gone through as an educator.  That's not to say that I have not changed, because I've changed ... like A LOT!  I think that most of the changes that have occurred for me as a teacher is due in large part to two things - confidence and trust.

As a first year teacher, you walk into your class for the first time wide-eyed and bushy-tailed, but completely unprepared for what lies ahead of you.  You may slowly begin to doubt yourself and your abilities, but as each year passes those feelings begin to recede.  Through the past couple of years I've learned to trust myself to the point that I'm fully confident in myself (or at least to the point where I can fake it!).  I'm now more open to trying new methods out in my class because I know that I'm doing it with the best intentions, and hopefully, my students can see the value in trying out new things in their own lives.  The level of confidence that I've grown into at this point of my career has provided me with a voice that I'm no longer scared to use when it's necessary.  I value myself enough to know that I need to be able to speak up not only for myself, but my students as well.

Trust ... this is something that I continuously find myself working on.  It's difficult to fully trust anyone to the point where you can let go and let them take the lead.  In terms of teaching, it's difficult to hand the reigns over to someone else - others in your department or even your students - without knowing whether or not you've made the right decision.  The first couple of years of teaching were difficult for me because I chose to not trust others.  I felt that only I knew what was best for my classes and students, but looking back to that point of time, I've realized that I only put myself into a really stressful point in my life.  I now take the chance to allow others to come into my classroom to offer suggestions and am constantly using the feedback provided by my peers and superiors.  I'm no longer scared of expanding my horizons through the building of bridges based on trust.

On that note, I've also learned to trust my students and their abilities to lead their education.  By taking a step back from being the "sage on the stage" and truly allowing my students to not just ask questions but also search for them, we've all become better at the whole "education beast".  I absolutely love watching my students collaborating and solving issues.  The first couple of PBLs that we completed in class this year were a bit rough in presentation, but the students are really responsive.  They love the opportunities to take control of the direction that we take in class, and they absolutely adore the chance to be as creative as possible.  Competitive edge comes out with each unit, and I love seeing the students pushing themselves to the point that they reach the "AHA" moment.  Teachers and administrators have walked in on the students working, and the students are so lost in their work that they fail to even notice someone's walked into the room.  They enter into the glorious trance created by the passion and curiosity that stems from me trusting them to work alone.

After reflecting on where I've developed in these past couple of years, I can only be completely stoked about what's to come.  The possibilities are endless, and I can only hope that I'm more than willing to progress into the type of teacher that my students can be proud of at the end of the day.

-A